Swimming


“If you do something in the spirit of non-achievement, there is a good quality in it. So just to do something without any particular effort is enough.”
Shunryu Suzuki



To make something of these times I 
must make something so I will find 
a frame in which to nail my thoughts. 
I cannot beat this lone silence

and I cannot take this seedless 
greening anymore, this yearning 
growth that knows only down and in,
only dragging my thoughts into 

the night where I cannot find them 
though I remember having them, 
remember how they felt if not 
how they looked, remember them close 

and warm, and thought them somehow grand 
or at least telling at the time 
I barely had them, but now? Now 
I barely have them even less. 

Now I am not sure if I have
them or if they have me. Now they 
are lost in their own depths, swimming 
silently in the rolling black 

medium of their making. Now 
they haunt me in their bare being
and unmake me and swim through me
and I will make nothing of them.







founding





i have long been enamored of you 

only lately have i found
atonement 
with you

at 
onement 


i have always been with you
for a long while
many times
before

i have found 
many selves
by your side

lost
at the base of you

tangled 
in your hair

resting 
at your feet

beating
in the heart of you

basking
in the heat of you

toiling
in the sweat and 
the grime of you


I did not come to you
late in life, but I
have only just
come to 

my coming
to you

lately 

and now
—just now—
we have only moments

and still
I find my self
 
and you have named me