Morning Haiku(-ish)




light dances on fields

of belligerent sleep, chasing

crows and hard scarecrows







...inspired by the sunlight of Ms. Susan L. Daniels...

...ok, so I can't count...eight syllables in line 2....

...and it's not really a haiku or even a senryu...

...so sue me...

...puttin' the Po' in NaPoWriMo...

...aaww...Po' 'Ku....

18 thoughts on “Morning Haiku(-ish)”

I love it! You put my grumpy, pre-coffee haiku in its place 😉

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johnnycrabcakes on April 17, 2013 at 10:13 said:

Hmmm…don’t know about that….rather liked your grumpy ‘ku right where it was….
….and those crows were dark, dark thoughts….that scarecrow was me, I think….woke up with “hard scarecrow” rolling around in my head…you gave me the perfect place to put its bony countenance…

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- Susan L Daniels on April 17, 2013 at 10:15 said:
  
  Thanks, JC! Getting coffee now. I feel the need for something iced this morning.
  
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take out the ‘of’ in line two, and the comma in line two … works for me

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johnnycrabcakes on April 17, 2013 at 23:43 said:

Well, I’m pretty keen on the light doing the dancing and the chasing…
May try a re-write yet…

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LOL When I first read this, I thought they were belligerent SHEEP. ROFL Perhaps the crows and scarecrows colored my impression. Or I’ve been watching too many episodes of Shaun the Sheep with my son…

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j.h. white on April 18, 2013 at 20:13 said:

Oh my…so did I. Oh …the images LoL

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- johnnycrabcakes on April 21, 2013 at 13:04 said:
  
  Thanks J–
  
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johnnycrabcakes on April 21, 2013 at 12:21 said:

That’s funny because I keep reading “sheep” too…

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- Jilanne Hoffmann on April 21, 2013 at 12:26 said:
  
  Sometime in the next couple of days, I’m going to be posting a link to a blog by a neuroscientist grad student that may explain this phenomenon. Stay tuned…
  
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  - johnnycrabcakes on April 21, 2013 at 13:05 said:
    
    I look forward to it!
    
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    - Jilanne Hoffmann on April 23, 2013 at 16:44 said:
      
      I’ve posted it. Don’t know if you’ve seen it yet.
      
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      - johnnycrabcakes on April 23, 2013 at 20:59 said:
        
        Saw it. TOO cool! Short on time today — will get there before bed.
        
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🙂 my friend Bill calls these no-ku lol!

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johnnycrabcakes on April 21, 2013 at 12:23 said:

or how about “funryu”…
https://aprayerlikegravity.wordpress.com/2012/12/29/acorn-senryu/

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- Whimsy Mimsy on April 21, 2013 at 16:05 said:
  
  Wow. That’s a blast from the past!!!
  
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  - johnnycrabcakes on April 22, 2013 at 09:16 said:
    
    Only four months but it does seem like so long ago, doesn’t it? Maybe blogging is keeping us young if we’re experiencing this stretching of time. Maybe this summer will last forever….sorry, did I just channel Annette?
    
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Pingback: Brain Tricks – Neuroscience, Poetry and Sheep | Jilanne Hoffmann

A Prayer Like Gravity

Mundus vult decipi

Morning Haiku(-ish)

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